Looking back into my archives, I found this interesting post from Saturday, July 4, 2009, the summer when my daughter and I were living in the UK. Shows how much I’ve changed in the intervening years. Here is what I wrote:
Well, I’m 2 weeks into the next step in my unfoldment and I still feel like a hopelessly confused mess. I ask myself, what is it that I want? I want to be a warrior. Although I think I’m not very good at it. I think what I’m trying to do is erase my hard drive, so to speak, but how?
I like the idea of going to Eden, http://www.edenproject.com, and then hiking and camping along the southwest coastal path, http://www.southwestcoastalpath.co.uk, but I need to do more research on the trains. I don’t understand how we get around on the trains or how much it costs. Right now I’m spending £32 per day on housing and the Underground. So if I spend less on housing by camping (let’s say £16 per day) that leaves £16 per day for trains and buses (£112 per week), but I have no idea what that means in terms of how far we can travel, how many days, etc. So I gotta do some research.
Here’s a list I came up with about what I’m supposed to be doing here:
1) Washing away the past
2) Breaking out of old patterns
3) Challenging myself
4) Becoming a warrior
5) Trusting the Spirit to guide me
6) Learning to make decisions and stick with them
7) Developing unbending intent
8) Learning to trust my intuition
9) Reading the Castaneda books, learning as much as I can from them, and putting the principles into practice
10) Turning off the internal dialogue
11) Doing some free-writing every day
12) Conquering all my fears