Evon Davis

Our planet is entering a very karmic time for relationships, especially intimate, karmic relationships.  Starting now and for the next 3 months, we will have a Venus retrograde and 2 eclipses, all in Gemini.

Venus in retrograde motion is supposed to mean that our love lives enter a fated period where we may relive past life experiences in order to sort out karmic issues.

Venus Retrograde 2012

11 April 2012
15 May 2012
27 June 2012
31 July 2012

Venus enters retrograde zone at 7° Gemini.
Venus stationary retrograde at 24° Gemini.
Venus stationary direct at 7° Gemini.
Venus leaves retrograde zone at 24° Gemini.

According to Dark Star Astrology (http://darkstarastrology.com/venus-retrograde/), the overall vibe for the whole retrograde cycle has a very karmic feel which fits nicely with the traditional concept of retrograde planets. This karmic feel comes from Venus conjunct the South Node of the Moon by a mere five minutes.

This suggests that our love lives really will go through a period of reliving past love life experiences. The South Node also indicates that some of our more negative habits or attitudes about love and relationships will be brought to light, and the more troubling aspects of our relationships will be highlighted.

It can also mean that we run into old friends and lovers again, from this life and past lives. Any new relationships formed during the next few months will likely be past life connections, we will get that feeling of having known them before. The aim of all this is to resolve painful karmic memories. This is because the other very tight aspect is Venus square Chiron, we are being forced to face our inner pain in relation to love, the pain of being dumped or humiliated by infidelity, or the karmic pain caused by doing this to others.

Venus square Chiron means we are forced, through events and through relationships, to face the pain of the past. By doing so, the difficult work of healing the pain can begin, this is the nature of Chiron, wounding to heal.

A Venus trine to Saturn suggests progress in this next phase of the retrograde cycle, through to the direct station on June 27. More understanding, more commitment. Commitment to long term relationships seems very important here, that is the message from this aspect, and the fixed stars have been pointing to the pain resulting from infidelity. Saturn on the most fortunate of stars Spica, is “favorable for domestic matters.”

The path leads to healing and transformation through open communication. This is shown by the grand trine with Mercury, Mars and Pluto. Venus conjunct Mercury on the 1st of June at 8 Gemini really puts the focus on communication in relationships.  This will likely climax around July 5 with Venus at 8 degrees Gemini sextile Uranus, an aspect pattern which uncovers secrets. There is the possibility of unexpected news, new information which leads to higher awareness and breakthroughs.

On June 5 we get Venus square Mars, feelings should be intense, with a mixture of love and hate, sexual passion and desire. There may be some conflict, but Venus on the fixed star Rigel is more supportive of love rather than hate, Venus on this star gives a “good and influential marriage especially if female.”

Venus sextile Uranus is within one degree orb from June 18 to July 8. This is very fortunate and suggests major breakthroughs in those relationship issues which have been causing problems. The first exact sextile is on June 21.

We will continue to work on these issues well into next year. This is because Venus entered the shadow zone, and stationed direct at 7 degrees Gemini, and the lunar eclipse on 28 November 2012 is also at 7 degrees Gemini, and lunar eclipses do put a focus on our relationships.

It starts with confronting the karmic pain, the deep wound in the soul memory of being abandoned, betrayed or rejected. Venus is trine Saturn meaning the end result is maturity and wisdom from having dealt seriously with the issues and any guilt or shame is lifted.

Venus retrograde in 2012 is intense, a transit of Venus, an eclipse, Uranus square Pluto, and all those major fixed stars with an emphasis on love relationships.

For me, it means, let go, surrender, be with myself in the here and now, take care of meeting my own needs and desires.  I have to be at peace with that.

Recently I was meditating, trying to find out what was deep inside me that was causing me to continue feeling sadness and anger around a particular man in my life.  I was sitting with pen and paper in my lap so I’d be able to write the insights as soon as they came.

I sat with that for a while, then I wrote, “He can’t be the solution.”  As I was putting the period at the end of that sentence my phone rang.  It was him.

The lesson I have to learn is that I can’t manipulate him into making me feel safe.

I may be writhing in excrutiating pain at times over the next 3 months… if I’m not willing to take 100% responsibility and learn my karmic lessons.  (I’m actually feeling a bit nervous about it.)  But when I get to the other side, I know it will be worth it.  If I go through this initiation and alchemize my karma, I will empower myself.  If I don’t, I may not get another chance in this lifetime.

Remember this post in 3 months….. we’ll see how we look on the other side

Why Everything Has Beauty In It

In A Separate Reality, don Juan says, “A warrior knows that her life will be over altogether too soon; she knows that she, as well as everybody else, is not going anywhere; she knows, because she sees, that nothing is more important than anything else.  Nothing being more important than anything else, she chooses any act, and acts it out as if it matters to her. Her controlled folly makes her say that what she does matters and makes her act as if it did, and yet she knows that it doesn’t; so when she fulfills her acts she retreats in peace, and whether her acts were good or bad, or worked or didn’t, is in no way part of her concern.

“But then if nothing really matters, as you ask me, how can I go on living?”

To understand what don Juan is saying here, it’s important to remember that he always says a warrior has unbending intent.  So the paradox is that we commit to an act with unbending intent, and yet at the same time are completely unattached to the outcome.

How can that be?

It is so, because when you know that you are mortal, you don’t have time to waste on self-pity, self-doubt, or regret.  A warrior cannot waste time on those things.  As long as you commit to your acts with unbending intent, that’s all that matters.  There is no such thing as a bad outcome or a failure.

A warrior is fully present in each moment and sees the beauty in that moment, whether you are picking up scrap metal or making fudge, it’s the act of being fully present that makes it successful, not the financial outcome.  A warrior makes the decision to do what he’s doing and he lets go of any doubts that he should be doing something different; he lets go of regrets about what he is not doing.  Life is too short for doubt or regret.

A warrior works as hard as she can for what she wants and if she doesn’t get it, she looks instead upon the beauty in what she has:  her freedom, a friend, the chance to make a new start with no personal history, setting upon a journey of discovery, creating the distance necessary to feel desire, a return to innocence.

When all outcomes are equal, the warrior is lusty for life.  There’s so much at the banquet.  A warrior never goes hungry.

It often astounds me that we spend so many years in school and yet never learn some of the most important and basic things we need in life to be healthy, functional adults.  One of the things we need to learn is how to establish healthy boundaries.  Instead, most people grow up being raised by dysfunctional adults who never learned to establish healthy boundaries of their own.

As Marshall Rosenberg, author of Non-Violent Communication: A Language of Life, says, “We are raised in a domination culture with a domination language.”  People grow up learning roles of domination and submission, rather than empowerment.

When people are empowered, there are no masters or slaves; there is no room for manipulation of any kind.

Healthy boundaries are a necessary part of empowering oneself and others.  When we choose healthy boundaries, we are able to state our feelings and needs, and make requests with absolute clarity and decisiveness.  There is no emotional manipulation, no wishy-washiness, no passive-aggressive behavior, no game-playing, no leaking of one’s personal power; there are no mixed messages, no excuse-making avoidance tactics, no demands.  It is a simple statement:  this is who I am; this is what I need; these are my boundaries.

Sometimes we also need to add:  If you want to be in any kind of meaningful relationship with me, you will respect my boundaries.

But it’s up to each of us to tell other people what our boundaries are.  To assume that they can read our minds is self-defeating, and ultimately self-destructive.

Everyone has needs.  Healthy boundaries, and communicating them to others, helps us to get our needs met.

Needs and Neediness are polar opposites.  A person who is needy has no boundaries.  That’s why they are needy.  Because they have no boundaries, their needs never get met, hence they are constantly needy.  Like the obese person who suffers from malnutrition, the needy person craves nourishment that is never satiated because they don’t really know who they are, what they need, what they want, or how to communicate those things to other people.

A person with healthy boundaries is able to live a life of total honesty and integrity.  This kind of person doesn’t have to beg, manipulate, or convince others to meet his or her needs.  All they have to do is state very clearly:  this is who I am; this is what I need; this is what I want; these are my boundaries.

Don Juan said, “Personal power is everything.”  Know your boundaries.  State them clearly.  Empower yourself.